It’s common knowledge that knowing when to say ‘I love you’ can be quite difficult! Getting the right relationship advice is important
Without a doubt men and women are wonderfully different. American author and relationship counsellor John Gray published his well-known book ‘Women are from Venus; Men are from Mars’ in 1993. The book outlines that although we are born of the same human species, the most common problems in relationships stem from basic psychological differences between the two sexes. Women seem to operate more on emotions, bringing essential factors in such as sensitivity and feelings. Relationship advice for women and dating tips is likely to be given from a balanced, emotive and profound point of view from other women. Women often bring in other comparable elements like discussing past relationships to consider whether the potential relationship will have a future. They look at the past, present and future of your partner, instead of just thinking about the here and now. Some women will also be thinking about their future offspring, especially if they can hear the clock ticking. Friends who give each other relationship advice often do so by relating it to their past, current relationship or other friend’s relationships. Women feel it is important to show empathy, compassion and understanding when giving advice, as they would want the same in return from a friend if needed.
There seems to be a need to avoid showing vulnerability…
John Gray states that the need for men to have their own time and independence is a biological inbuilt requirement that dates back to the male retreating to the cave (or to the shed!). While most women take on the role of mothering their children, the man will feel the responsibility of providing for his family, earning his income or if we were to refer to back in the day - hunting and gathering. Most men seem to be less openly emotional than women, not to say that they have less emotions, they have just learned to internalise them more. While women talk openly with each other about problems, relationship advice for men between friends can be limited. There seems to be a need to avoid showing vulnerability which has been instilled biologically, also in childhood, and has perhaps restricted communication. Relationship advice and dating tips between men more than often depends on their trust and type of friendship. Some men find it very easy to discuss issues or concerns, while others may avoid it altogether.
Communicate – start how you to mean to go on
Deciding that you want to meet someone and have a potential new relationship can be a very exciting time. Taking in to account that men and women may differ in their attitudes, behaviour and beliefs can be valuable and make a difference in meeting your partner.
So you think you’ve found the love of your life, your future partner, your long-term lover – and you’ve only been together five minutes? However, you are convinced this is ‘The One’ and you feel a deep love inside that flutters like butterflies whenever you’re with them. You’re desperate to tell them exactly how you feel, that you can clearly see an amazing future with them and that most importantly…you love them. Telling your partner such a big thing is for most people somehow nerve-wracking. Is it really the right time? Will they say it back? Don’t panic! Getting relationship advice from friends may be a good idea, especially if this is a feeling you have not experienced before. Relationship advice for women and relationship advice for men can differ in many ways, especially depending on the source of the advice. Most people get dating tips from a friend who is of the same sex rather than from someone of the opposite sex. Yet when it comes to relationship advice, it is sometimes helpful to know how the opposite sex think. As John Gray suggests, we are different – but we all have one thing in common, we all want to hear the words ‘I love you’.
PUBLISHED: 16 March 2016