What happens when we lose affection?
We can’t stay ‘in love’ all the time. Sooner or later that rosy glow fades and we have to work at making a happy life with another human being, who is as flawed as we are. Hopefully there will be enough compatibility and genuine warmth to get us through. But what to do if all affection seems to have gone? Walking away isn’t always the answer.
LOSING THAT LOVING FEELING
Affection isn’t quite the same as ‘love’. Affection is caring, closeness, sympathy, but these days we don’t use the word so much for passion. So, losing affection can be more radical than falling out of love. If you have lost all affection for your partner, not only do you not have strong feelings for them you may not want to touch, talk to or care for them., this can be very harsh on both parties.
WHY HAS AFFECTION DISAPPEARED?
You can lose affection for quite a few reasons:
- You find out that the person you loved wasn’t what you thought they were
- Your loved one has let you down so badly you just can’t feel any warmth towards them•You carry wounds to do with neglect and rejection – you may have overcome these to some extent during the ‘in love’ phase, but now the relationship is established you’ve switched off
- You’re going through depression, and can’t feel anything
- You’ve lost your self-esteem and therefore have nothing to give anyone else
- You’ve fallen in love with someone else and all your emotional energy is going towards them
- There has been violence or cruelty in the relationship
There may be other reasons for loss of affection, and sometimes it’s hard to know quite what’s happened. If you’re the one who has lost affection, then a little self-analysis will help you decide what to do. If your lover has withdrawn their affection, it’s reasonable for you to try to find out why. However, there’s a limit to the amount of time it’s useful to spend analysing.
If your lover has stopped loving you, don’t try to struggle on alone. Pretending to the world that everything is all right won’t make it so, and certainly won’t help you. Talk to trusted friends or consider having therapy to talk through deeper issues, remember that our helpful, understanding readers are always ready with insight and healing messages, so put in a call sooner rather than later.
SELF-ESTEEM IS KEY
Loss of self-esteem can, in itself, lead to loss of affection. Unless you feel good about yourself you can’t ever have anything worthwhile to give another person. Self-esteem issues are crucial in any relationship, so take a look at yours.
If your partner has stopped being affectionate to you, there’s no point begging or arguing. Your task now is to re-build your self-esteem, because only through this can you hope either to regain their affection, or to move on.
When you’ve had a loving partnership, leaving this and moving on can feel devastating however, there isn’t anything to be gained by trying to reignite something that’s died. Tell yourself that even though it seems difficult now, one day it will most certainly be easier. You will survive, and you will be stronger.
HOW WE CAN HELP
Support can come from many sources, but there is a great deal to be said for a detached, calm perspective, enriched by messages from Spirit. Our Reader can provide a unique insight and advice on this sometimes difficult situation – get comfort and a direction forward with a psychic reading.
PUBLISHED: 1 February 2021