THE EFFECTS OF BULLYING
Bullying is a really horrible experience. It’s frightening, and weeks, months, even years may be overshadowed by fear of what the bully will do next. It’s disempowering and deeply frustrating to know you’re at the mercy of someone who may be anything from a thug to a fiend. During the time you’re being bullied your whole life may be overshadowed, as the bully, or bullies, have stolen a chunk of it. You may have been isolated, wary of making the bullying worse, or ashamed of what was happening.
The worst wound is usually to your pride. If you’re stalked by a wild beast or trapped by a flood you will be traumatised, yet you can still feel good about yourself. Not so with bullying. Your oppressor may be long gone, yet you still struggle with self-esteem.
Being bullied may have affected your posture. This can be an unconscious habit and it will have far-reaching effects on your beliefs about yourself and life. Try standing tall and straight, making eye contact with people and smiling. It sounds ridiculously simple, but actually your subconscious will pick up the message that you’re strong and you’ll act accordingly. Gradually your attitude will change.
CHALLENGE YOUR MEMORIES
You may look back at the past and remember only that you were bullied, but actually, if you reflect on it, there were lots of other experiences. Think of all the times you were supported, understood, appreciated and respected. Remember all your successes. The past wasn’t just about being put down – it also held some good moments and these will have given you gifts.
BULLIES ARE WEAKLINGS
You remember that bully as being strong. They may almost have appeared to possess a supernatural power to root out and play on your weak spots. So why was that? The truth is the bully knows where to hurt because they have been hurt. They wound you to disguise their own vulnerability. Inside bullies are weak and scared. Imagine that bully in a situation in life where they are at the mercy of someone cruel, and more powerful than they are. This isn’t about revenge – it’s about realising that they did what they did because they were damaged. Maybe after they’d taken it out on you they went home to being abused themselves. So, not so strong after all.
FOCUS ON YOUR GOOD POINTS
Possibly you hate yourself for being ‘weak’. You are probably blind to all the amazing things you’ve done. But it’s very likely that anyone would have reacted the way you did if they’d been targeted. So now list all your fabulous qualities and your achievements. Resolve to love yourself, going forward.
THE FUTURE WILL BE DIFFERENT
It is all too easy to believe that the future will hold more of the same. But consider all the ways you have evolved as a person. Do you still wear nappies? Of course not. In the same way you grew from a baby you can ‘grow’ from the bullying. Imagine a great future where you are on top of things. It’s real – honest!
TALK ABOUT IT
You may feel silly because you can’t put the past behind you. This can be especially the case if the bullying happened in childhood yet as an adult you still can’t move on. But that’s only natural. We are all shaped by what happened in the past and the bullying has taught you to be afraid, and to feel inferior. Realising that help is available is the first step to recovery. Our Readers at TheCircle can enable you to find your inner dignity, to grow and move away from the experience. Just put in a call and begin that process of recovery.
Of course those bad memories can be stubborn. Here’s another reminder of what you can do about it. At TheCircle you can always contact a Psychic or Medium who can help you. Benefit from a Psychic Reading, check your Horoscope, get some advice, insight and support. A Clairvoyant Reading is a great way to shift your viewpoint, so make contact with us without delay
PUBLISHED: 03 AUGUST 2015