Most of us have heard about the mid-life crisis – that time around forty when you feel you’ve lost your youth and may do all sorts of foolish things to get it back. But what about those years in your early-to-mid-twenties, when you are still young, but feel you’re missing out? Surely you should be on top of the world, but instead you feel adrift. How can you get back your direction?
HAVE YOU GOT THE YOUNG-ADULT BLUES?
We all go through stages in life when we feel down and confused. This can happen at any time. However, as you go into your twenties you face certain unique challenges.
• You aren’t a child any more, or an adolescent. You know you have to face the fact that you’re adult, but you may not be sure what being an adult means. It can be scary and confusing, and you may not feel ready.
• Probably you’ve finished Uni, or an apprenticeship. Surely you should now be on course in life? But you aren’t. You can’t decide quite what you want to do, and you may panic about this, or feel depressed.
• You may long to be independent (although secretly you may fear it, too.) But you can’t afford this and you may be still living at home or sharing accommodation with people you wouldn’t choose.
• You’ve had several relationships but nothing that’s ‘right’. Or you may be still a virgin, believing you’re the only one in the world! (You aren’t! There are thousands like you, all keeping quiet!)
• Possibly you’ve tried various courses or careers but none of them have worked out and you feel a failure.
• All your friends seem to be going places. Some have even started families. You’re being left behind.
• Life has lost its meaning. You don’t know what you believe – if anything – and the magic and trust of childhood are a million miles away. Yet part of you longs for them
The first thing you need to do about your state of mind is talk about it. That’s the same for virtually any problem, but you may be too young to realise this. Our supportive readers at The Circle are a wonderful first recourse for you.
• Remember that although you may feel as if you have the world on your shoulders, you have little to compare this with. These moods are all part of being human. Keeping things in proportion will help you cope.
• Astrologers recognize that the cycles of certain planets – namely Saturn and Uranus – are crucial in your early twenties. Although you may not be aware, you are going through this.
• Stop expecting too much of yourself and life. Just because you’re young, doesn’t mean everything’s should be always sweet, and you with a grin all over your face! Lowering your expectations can make you appreciate what you have.
• YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TIME. The sensation that it’s all slipping away is rubbish. Play with ideas, do things that are a bit ‘irresponsible’ like go off travelling, or playing sports. You’ll probably meet other people your age who feel the same.
• Ask yourself if you missed out a stage in life. Did you try to be too grown-up too quickly? Did you have the space to play and dream as a child, or were you pushed and burdened? Maybe you need a bit of time now to ‘play’.
• Stop comparing! You don’t have to be like your friends. Plenty of people start careers and families in their forties. Don’t force yourself.
• Do things for others. A bit of kindness goes a long way and if anyone’s on your case about being ‘useful’ doing charity work gives you an answer, while you’re considering what you want.
• Mindfulness classes are on trend now. They aren’t just for aging hippies. Try one and see.
• What about your spirituality? Explore beliefs and attitudes. Maybe there is something motivating and meaningful out there for you.
• THIS WILL PASS. You don’t have the experience to know that life goes through stages, so you could be overwhelmed. But this is temporary.
Of course it can be really difficult to pull yourself up when you’re down. That’s when you may need extra encouragement. At TheCircle you can always contact a psychic or medium who can help you. Benefit from a psychic reading, check your horoscope, get some advice, insight and support. A clairvoyant reading can show ways to move forwards, so make contact with us without delay
PUBLISHED: 15 JUNE 2015