You spend a lot of your time working. Your life is structured around it and most of what you need for the physical necessities of life depend on it. So it’s important to be as happy as possible when you’re earning your daily dollar.
Read how to:
- Get emotionally connected
MAINTAIN A WORK/LIFE BALANCE
Is work/life balance difficult for you? Start putting some boundaries into place, because if you don’t have some real down time, you are bound to get depleted.
Having a sound work/life balance is something that’s easily undermined by social media, smart phones and all the paraphernalia of modern life that means we are always observable and contactable. But remember you can switch off your gadgets and get away from it all.
If it’s hard to put work out of your mind, do something active and absorbing that takes you out of yourself. This could be a sport or creative hobby – watching telly will be of limited help because its effect on your brain is generally negative.
Insist on being unavailable at times. At night turn off your phone and put it out of the bedroom – the radiation emitted by your phone is harmful in any case, and not conducive to sleep. Keep telling yourself that the world won’t come to an end and your job will not fall apart if you have time to yourself. In fact you will function much better if you do this. With practice this will get easier.
DEAL WITH BULLYING
Bullying is very common. There are all sorts of bullying, from the tyrannical, judgmental boss to the colleague that criticizes or sneers. Some workplaces have a groups of unfriendly people who love to exclude you because it makes them feel better. All bullying arises from insecurity on the part of the bullies, but that doesn’t make it easier to cope with because, instinctively, bullies will poke at your insecurities. Very soon you feel bad about yourself, wonder if it’s all your fault, and feel powerless. That’s a downward spiral.
If possible, stop bullying in its tracks by confident body posture, direct eye contact and clear communication. But if you can’t do this, don’t beat yourself up. If you feel bullied, you are bullied. In a culture of bullying it may be too much to deal with, so choose your battles. Be kind to yourself, realise what’s happening, do not blame yourself – commit yourself to getting away from it as soon as you can.
PRACTICE MINDFULNESS DAILY
Mindfulness and meditation bring your mind into the here-and-now and put you in contact with that stillness that lies within. It doesn’t matter what form of mindfulness or meditation you choose and you don’t have to spend ages doing it. There are apps and downloads a-plenty to choose from, or go to a class, or consult articles on this site. Just five or ten minutes a day will make a world of difference to you, enabling you to relax and get things into proportion. Make a commitment to yourself that you will be mindful. You could set the alarm a few minutes earlier and start the day with meditation, or use some of your lunch hour that way. Soon you will notice a lift in your mood and greater internal peace.
KEEP YOUR SENSE OF HUMOUR
Work should not be too serious, whatever your job. Indeed, life should not be too serious! Seeing the funny side keeps everything in proportion. It prevents you getting too intense or anxious and lifts you when you feel unappreciated or take things personally. Look for a good laugh in your own way. It’s great to share this with colleagues, but if you can’t, find other outlets. Just reading a funny book and having a giggle to yourself during a break can work wonders.
FOSTER EMOTIONAL CONNECTION
We are all human and we all have worries and a vulnerable side. Everyone needs to feel they belong and even the most seemingly confident people can feel lonely and isolated inside.
Whenever you can, make an effort to empathise. Listen to others. Become involved in their concerns and join in. If a colleague is fund-raising, find out why and give support. If someone looks sad, show you care. Be the one who makes the tea or brings in cakes. Expressing natural kindness wherever and whenever you can will enrich your spirit and make everyone cheer up.
BE TRUE TO YOURSELF
However much effort you put into doing your job well and making other people happy, never lose sight of the fact that the most important person to listen to is you. This means you learn to say ‘no’ when you do not feel comfortable with something. Speak from your true voice, or keep quiet. Never pretend to be something or like something that you do not. The more you practice this the easier it will become and the more you will feel peaceful inside.
Being true to yourself also involves your choice of career. Maybe you are the type of person who is happy to get as well-paid a job as possible and jog along from day to day. However, if you have a sense of vocation, want to feel that your job is important and means something and that you are contributing something to the general good, listen to these promptings. It will be worth taking a pay cut to achieve all of this, because fulfillment in your job is vital to happiness.
LOOK FOR THE POSITIVE
Put good old ‘positive thinking’ into practice actively by sitting down at the end of the day and listing at least three good things that happened and/or you achieved at work – however small these may be. When you have made your list, concentrate on it and be grateful. Let gratitude flood your heart and warm you throughout. There are so many good things about working and when you focus on them they will multiply. And – hey! Presto! – you’ll be happy!
HOW WE CAN HELP
Now you have tips about work/life balance, dealing with bullying, meditation, encouraging humour, getting emotionally connected being true to yourself and looking for the positive. You now have some valuable tools to make you much happier at work. Extra help is always valuable, however, and it’s always on hand for you, so get in touch with one of our understanding Readers today and find the support you need to improve your working life.
PUBLISHED: 21 September 2018