When your friends are all settled down and social events are dominated by couples there just isn’t the option to meet someone by chance like there was in your twenties, so when you find yourself newly single and very much ready to mingle, dating sites can be the ideal solution.
When you reach your forties, time is a little more precious, but you also have a better idea of what you are looking for in a partner. Using online dating to facilitate your search can allow you to find people who share the same interests and hobbies as yourself, thus giving you an immediate indication of whether they would be a good match. Of course personality is also extremely important but once you’ve established the basics then you can take steps to learn more about their character.
The thought of putting yourself out there and ‘back on the market’ can be daunting, particularly if you have been single for a long time or have experienced a divorce. The best thing to go is to be proactive in your search for love and following these top tips to online dating can make the process feel a lot less intimidating.
Choosing the right dating site is the first step and with so many out there it’s worth doing some research to find one that’s right for you. You’ll find quite a lot of variations between sites; some cost money to join, others are free. Some involve a friend recommending you, others cater to certain interests. Choose a site that has plenty of members within the age bracket you’re looking for to maximise your success in finding a suitable match.
Your online dating profile tells other people the basics of what you are. It shouldn’t be long and rambling but nor should it be a one-liner: 2-3 short paragraphs with some of your key interests should do it. It’s important to be honest when you create your profile. Although it can be tempting to exaggerate or even lie to make yourself sound more appealing, just think about how you’d feel if it was the other way round. If you read a profile which turned out be dishonest, how would you feel about that person? The ideal partner will love you for who you are.
With any kind of dating, it’s good to keep an open mind. So a psychic might have told you you’re going to meet a tall, dark, handsome stranger, but you’ve found yourself getting on like a house on fire with a freckled redhead. Don’t rule them out! You need to find someone attractive, but they might just have that sparkle in their eyes rather than fitting some prescribed ideal in your head.
When you decide that the time is right to bite the bullet and arrange that first date, go for it. You need to have exchanged enough messages to feel comfortable, but don’t go back and forth for months on end. It’s important to see how you interact with someone face-to-face.
Tell a friend where you’re meeting your date, even show them a picture of your date and tell them their name. These days you can Google a person and find out that they are who they say they are, so do it! It is safer and less intimating to meet your date in a busy public place such as a restaurant or a bar.
Finally, don’t expect to meet the ‘one’ straight away. Even if you have one or two unsuccessful dates think of it as a learning experience. You’ll get there in the end but for now enjoy the ride!