Relationship conflicts can often be difficult to resolve. How to overcome conflicts and what to do when you have a disagreement…
When two people do not agree on something, it can create tension and long drawn out feelings of discontentment between you, especially if it is never resolved. If you have disagreed on something important, then it can have a negative effect on communication, creating relationship conflicts and unease in the home. Finding ways to resolve the situation, deal with disagreements and to overcome conflicts is often a learning process but can have a powerful and positive effect on the future of your relationship.
Coming to an understanding on how each of you feels and acknowledging the difference in your opinions is the first step to finding a solution…
When a couple argue or disagree on something it can have a harmful effect on their feelings for each other. It can sometimes feel like you can’t find common ground or mutual understanding on a particular subject and that feelings and opinions are not taken in to consideration from the other person. Relationship conflicts can have a negative effect on how you can communicate with each other and how you can resolve matters. Coming to an understanding on how each of you feels and acknowledging the difference in your opinions is the first step towards finding a solution. Sometimes you have to agree to disagree, especially if you both very strongly feel you cannot change your view, but be aware that the disagreement needs to be recognised and that you then have to find a way to move forward, respecting each other’s feelings.
We can sometimes behave like a toddler having a tantrum wanting our partner to just agree with us!
HOW TO DEAL WITH DISAGREEMENTS
When a disagreement happens, most of us naturally jump to being defensive. We want the other person to see our point of view and we feel righteous in our interpretation of the situation, often letting pride get in the way of listening to the other person. We can sometimes behave like a toddler having a tantrum wanting our partner to just agree with us! We may be impatient, stubborn and even arrogant but we may also fear the consequences of the disagreement and worry that there will never be a mutual understanding or that we may even lose our relationship. Serious relationship conflicts can have severe implications and can potentially cost you your relationship, so learning how to deal with disagreements in the long-term can be of great benefit:
LISTEN: Listen to each other’s point of view. Give each other time to talk and do not interrupt. Giving the other person your full attention and showing that you are willing to listen to their side of the story shows them that they should do the same for you.
: Shouting or yelling is an act of aggression and will never resolve anything. Letting anger
build up will only add fuel to the fire, as both parties act on the defensive and will not listen to each other.
TIME OUT: If you find that the disagreement is getting heated and one or both of you is shouting or angry then step back from the situation and have some time out. Take a break to calm down and say to the other person ‘We won’t resolve this by shouting, let’s talk again when we are calmer’.
COMMUNICATE: Talking and discussing is a far better way to communicate. Be open, explain your opinions and then listen attentively to theirs. Both of you should try to understand how the other is feeling. Once you have listened, discuss how you can resolve the situation.
COMPROMISE: If you have compromised to overcome conflicts then stick to your word and do not re-visit the disagreement at a later date. This will show your partner that you are willing to change your opinion or attitude to resolve the situation, which should make them more open to doing the same for you.
Everyone can learn to communicate…
COMMUNICATION IS KEY
Couples can always overcome conflicts and deal with disagreements by communicating their thoughts, feelings and needs better. Communication is key in understanding each other and getting to know each other, especially if it is a new relationship. Some of us lack communication skills which can often stem from our childhood or a relationship where we have felt unable to express ourselves safely. Everyone can learn to communicate and as long as you are in a relationship with someone that you can trust, then there is no reason why you cannot articulate how you feel. Sometimes, women find it easier to communicate than men, but with a little encouragement and understanding, men can voice their feelings just as well. Learn to let out your feelings, to express your emotions and to work together to find solutions.
HOW WE CAN HELP
Have you had a disagreement with your partner and you do not know how to resolve it? Do you miss your ex and wonder if you could overcome disagreements from the past? Relationship conflicts are one of the biggest reasons for breakups, and often it is simply a case of a minor disagreement or misunderstanding. Find out what’s in store for your relationship and what the future holds. Get insight and advice in love or guidance on your relationship. Speak to one of our gifted readers at TheCircle and feel empowered for your romantic future.
PUBLISHED: 12 October 2016